Love and the Law of Attraction

When was the last time you said, "I love you" to someone? Do you have a spouse, child, parent, sibling, other relative, or friend to whom you can say this . . . occasionally or on a regular basis?

Many people do not express how they feel to those they love for a variety of reasons: fear of rejection, fear of judgment, embarrassment, shyness, shame, believing you won't hear it in return, and a myriad of other possibilities. However, most of these reasons can be boiled down to one overriding cause - lack of self love. This translates into lack of confidence and low self-esteem, which in turn can create lots of negative feelings and experiences in our lives. Law of Attraction says we create our reality by how we think and feel - whether positive or negative. The Universe has no judgment as to whether something is good or bad for is. It just matches what we are feeling - the vibration we are offering - and gives us more of the same.

Therefore, lack of self love can affect us in every area of our lives . . . our relationships, our health, our jobs and financial situation, and our spiritual beliefs. If you could see the potential for a better life by learning to really and truly love yourself, would you be willing to try? Once you start loving yourself and others, your world around you will change as well. The outer is but a reflection of the inner.

There is a very easy way to determine if lack of self love is indeed your reason for not telling others you love them, and hence for the negative experiences in your life. Look in the mirror. Look straight into your eyes and say out loud, your name, followed by the words "I love you." Pay close attention to how you feel. Be honest with yourself. No one else is listening. How do you react? Is there any feeling in any part of your body? What emotions, if any, are triggered. The experiences and reactions I've observed in my years of training have included everything from sincere, heartfelt expression, to breaking out into tears, to not even being able to speak.

If you can tell yourself you love yourself, with no emotional charge, you're more than half way to being able to tell others you love them too. They want to hear it; they need to hear it. Even if they don't return the sentiment, you honor yourself and them by telling them how you feel. Try it, you'll like it. And so will they.

If you are someone who has difficulty saying these words to yourself, that should not cause reason for concern. Be grateful you are able to recognize your challenge and start your new journey from where you are. Be gentle with yourself. Start slowly. If you can only look at yourself and not say anything, do that. After a time if you can mouth the words, do that. Or try one word at a time. Any word will do. Practice this every morning and every evening - a good time is when you brush your teeth. You're already doing something good for yourself; let's build on that momentum!

I promise you, after a few days, weeks, perhaps a month, it will start to get easier. Even if you do not believe the words to be true, if you can say them, eventually the Law of Attraction will find that vibration and give you things to love about yourself. You've got nothing to lose, much to gain, and very little time invested.

And . . . you will notice something else. When you begin to love yourself truly, from the very depths of your being, others will notice. They will pick up on the love vibration you are offering. Law of attraction will bring people to you who will respond to your feelings of love. The more love you feel - the more you offer this vibration to yourself, others, and the universe - the more you will attract. You will be in vibrational alignment with others who are sharing that feeling. It's magical. The arguments with your spouse will cease. The mean boss will start to be nicer. The tension between you and your neighbor, kids, relatives, etc. will subside and eventually vanish. Your thinking will become more clear and focused; your decisions will be more appropriate to your successful outcomes, and you will feel the abundance the Universe has to offer in all areas of your life.

That's the way it works. To quote Abraham-Hicks, "The essence of that which is like unto itself is drawn. . . . It is Law."

Protect Your Vibration

One of my favorite phrases is, "We teach what we need to learn." In that vein, over the last two years I've learned it is sometimes in our best interest to let go of people we've known for a very long time, when they offer a negative vibration.

I had three friends I'll call Jane, Alice, and Betty. I met Jane 25 years ago, Alice 15 years ago and Betty 10 years ago. Suffice to say we were connected for a very long time.

Our conversations mostly seemed to center around what wrongs people were doing to us. The emotionally absent husband, the unresponsive and inconsiderate children, the demanding boss and annoying co-workers, and similar grievances. Although I didn't experience too much of this personally, I certainly got hooked into the conversation, commiserating and sympathizing with each example of victimization.

When I began to study Law of Attraction, among other teachings, I became conscious of how inappropriate these conversations felt. Rather than feeling connected to these women, I started to feel extremely out of alignment. These interactions felt judgmental, negative, and toxic. I went away feeling emotionally and physically drained.

Law of Attraction was new and exciting to me. I spoke about it with anyone who was interested. I studied every LoA teacher I resonated with. Spent thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours learning and then teaching what I learned, and then learning some more.

Jane, Alice and Betty politely listened to what I had to share. But it soon became apparent they were not interested in looking any further, nor would they consider allowing me the choice of eliminating negative stories from our conversations. With extreme consideration and a bit of trepidation, I realized I had to let them go.

It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. Jane and Alice faded away. After receiving one of Jane's emails which disparaged my Law of Attraction comments, I chose not to respond. She in turn did not follow up. That was a year ago. During a phone call with Alice, I provided a Law of Attraction observation in response to her complaint about her boss. She politely ended the conversation and hasn't called me since. Over six months has passed.

Betty was a different story. During a phone conversation, she called a mutual friend of ours a bitch. She proceeded to offer vast amounts of evidence as to why our friend was to blame for her situation. She also declared, in no uncertain terms, how no one appreciated or acknowledged anything she did, and according to her, she did everything right. I call that martyr syndrome.

So I suggested we are responsible for everything we attract into our lives - a basic Law of Attraction concept. She started screaming at me! I asked her to stop. She got louder! I said (or tried to over her incessant and vociferous rantings) I would have to hang up if she persisted in treating me in this manner (memories of my mother began to creep in). She would have none of it. I said goodbye and ended the connection. Forever.

Upon reflection, I absolutely recognize I attracted these women with the state of consciousness i was in at the time. When I changed, my feelings changed. When my feelings changed, my vibration changed. Theirs didn't.

If I gave you a glass of poison and said, "Here, have a drink," you would think I was crazy. Of course you wouldn't drink it. You wouldn't dare allow a toxin into your body that could make you sick. So think about the people in your life. Are they toxic to your energy body? If so, what is that doing to your vibration?

Protect your vibration. Eliminate or at the very least, severely limit the interactions you have with toxic people. If these people are in your family or at your place of work and it is impossible to completely remove them from your experience, there are other ways you can protect your vibration. The stronger your positive vibration, the less likely it will be that these people will be able to have an effect on your emotions.

I invite and encourage your comments.

Barbara